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The breakup of Bobifer
by Kris on 1/31/2004 (0)

Sadly, all hope for a Gigli 2 now seems lost.
Hot on the heals of the Bennifer breakup (Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez) comes the shocking demise of Bobifer (Bob Reiss and Jennifer Doyel). After a whirlwind romance, the likes of which hasn't been seen since a very romantic occasion years ago involving two sheep and a robotic goat, a representative from the J-Do camp has officially announced the end of Bobifer, citing irreconcilable differences and a debilitating cough syrup addiction.

Bob Reiss is a part-time actor, part time playground engineer. He first garnished the national spotlight for his playground design featured on Dateline. His playground had single handedly doubled the number of playground related deaths in a five year period. In 1998, Bob finally garnished some positive attention for his role as the former mouse trainer turned secret agent James Milton in the motion picture "Of Mice and Spies". While he was given critical praise for this role, it was his follow-up film, "Spies like Gus" that won him eighteen Emmys including Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Supporting Actress, and Best Adaptation of a story written on a napkin. "Spies like Gus" focused on the adventures of Jack Brian (played by Bob Reiss) as he follows in the footsteps of his idol Gus and attempts to use his previous circus training to aid the US government in stealing the plans for a mind controlling antelope from a group of Scottish Drug lords.

Jennifer Doyel began her acting career in numerous child safety videos, playing roles such as the kid who eats paste, sticks her fingers in the light sockets, and attempts to lick crumbs out of a toaster. These roles allowed her to land a role in the 1995 romantic comedy "While you were Dead" in which she pretends to be the love interest of a man killed in a tragic paste eating accident, only to end up falling in love with his vampire friend Count Dracula. She first met Bob at her next feature, "Spies like Gus", where she had a small part in which she placed her fingers in a light socket and was electrocuted to death, only to be tripped over later by Jack Brian. While the two did meet, is wasn't until their next feature that a romance truly bloomed.

In 2002, Bob Reiss and Jennifer Doyel were staring opposite each other in the sequel to the Great American Cinema, Citizen Kane. Titled "Citizen Kane 2: Wrath of Kane", Bob played the title role of Charles Foster Kane, returned from the dead to reclaim his sled which had been stolen by the Nazis (lead by Nils Jeppe, played by William Shatner) and was being used to find to location of the Ark of the Covenants. Jennifer Doyel played the estranged Nazi soldier Fem Nazia who falls in love with Kane, only to end up meeting death when attempting to lick crumbs out of a toaster.

Bob and Jennifer became very close to each other during filming of Citizen Kane 2, and afterward, they were seen at various restaurants, coffee houses, and Pizza Huts together.

"While they never admitted to being involved during this period, they were seen together so much, we just had to tell the public they were," says one sleazy tabloid reporter.

After months of speculation, the existence of Bobifer was finally confirmed when the two announced their engagement at a local bull riding competition.

The wedding was planned for May 21st of this year on the Moon.

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