Husband-wife cops arrest each other
on 6/20/2004 (0)
An apparent domestic riff between married Cook County, Illinois law enforcement officers Bill and Stacy Glass ends in stalemate
|You have the right to keep quiet. I have the right to the last word. |
Eyeing each other hotly, Illinois state police officers Bill and Stacy Glass, weapons loosely holstered, attempt to work out their marital difficulties.
Staring coldly, Stacy began in a cold, measured tone
"When I tell you to come straight home after work, I expect exactly that. Did I say something that you misunderstood? Do you have anything in your ears that I might stick myself with?"
Bill fingered his handcuffs nervously
"Don't even think about it mister...put your hands where I can see them!"
Bill interlocked his fingers around his knee and carefully leaned forward
"I understood what you told me. It was my own decision, which I take full responsibility for, to make a change based on the actual course of events. I decided to stop off for a beer with the D.A. and some of the guys. May I remind you that I'm not in violation of any state or federal laws, and I am contending that you're merely abusing your authority to intimidate me...which can be considered grounds for dismissal in accordance with Illinois State law..."
Stacy unclasped her pepper spray holster
"He-he...trying that angle, Bill? It didn't work last week, it won't work this week either. When I give a direct order, I expect it to be obeyed. To do otherwise falls under resisting...do I make myself clear?"
The two stared dead-eye icely. You could almost hear the ceiling fan whooshing through the room's stagnant air
Suddenly, both drew their weapons
"You have the right to remain silent!" Bill shot back "Anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law!"
After the duet finished Miranda, they handcuffed each other, and drove to precinct H.Q.
Cook County precinct chief Johhny Beauford grinned and whispered softly.
"This ain't the first time. Bill and Stacy have done the mutual arrest thing twice before. I'm not quite sure what the appropriate course of action is. We don't prosecute them, of course. It's more of a principle thing."
Beauford scratched his nose
"But this is the sort of thing that happens when you take two strong willed people and give them a badge and a marriage license. It's like a clown juggling nitroglycerin really, although I'll bet it makes their sex life interesting."
Beauford took a quarter out of his shirt pocket
"Call it! And no two outta three crap this time, neither!"isplay:0" style="display:no
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