on 7/29/2002 (0)
The world was once a terrible place. Plagues swept across the earth destroying all life. Crime ran rampart across the countryside. Children were left to starve as their parents desperately searched for work. Fires began randomly, for no apparent purpose other than mass destruction. Traffic lights cease functioning and were left in a continual state of yellow. Celine Dion ruled Canada with an iron fist. Dogs walked backwards and had their asses shaved. Carbonated beverages were tasty, but high in calories. The oceans boiled and the skies rained down fire and brimstone. Yes indeed, the world was not a friendly place.
|"The World was in the figurative crapper."|
That was until July 22, 2002, nearly one week ago to this very date! It was this day that a website named Smooth Operator appeared on the scene and changed everything... for the better. No longer is there massive starving and a poor economy. Celine Dion has been removed from power in Canada and dogs now walk forward once again (but still with shaven asses). Crime has been reduced from a full run to a slow jog. Carbonated beverages now have lower calorie, "Diet" versions and the sky rains sweet liquid water instead of fire and death. Yes indeed, the world is a better place.
"I saw the terrible state of the world and decided that it was time to do something to make a difference" said Kris, designer of this site (that we have no affiliation with what so ever). "I developed this site to bring together people, to inspire them, and to give them hope in their time of need. There are too many sites out there that serve no real purpose, sites that just don't matter. We don't need anymore of those. This site matters. This site will make a difference." Judging from reader response, this is exactly what they wanted too.
"This site changed my life. I used to be a high priced lawyer for a large law firm. But after visiting this site, I've realized the errors of my ways. I've realized how terrible a person that I truly was. Now, I have given up my fancy living and sinning ways. I currently live in a old refrigerator in the dump with a hunchback midget that I love. I've never been happier in my life," said one loyal visitor.
"Before I visited this site, I used to browse porn sites all day. Now thanks to this site, I have realized that there are other things out their besides porn. I now have a large stamp collection and am working on a device to harness moon rays to create a race of super shrimp!" said another visitor. "Once my super shrimp are complete, I will bring the world to it's knees! All hail Lord Sod!"
|Tremble before your wicked masters!|
"I used to be down on my luck. Nothing ever went my way. I couldn't afford to even feed my children. Then I visited this site. Sure, I still can't feed my kids still, but I don't feel so bad about it anymore."
Amidst all the praise, it seems there is always someone that is dissatisfied. Except in this case. Everyone loves this site, there are no exceptions at all. This site has made a difference for everyone concerned. All this and the site has been only open for a week! The future for this site is limitless. We can only wait and see as to how things turn out, and possibly make random guesses that are completely unfounded.
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