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Battle of the TV judges part 1
by Mark on 8/3/2004 (0)

"Waaahh!...Burt!"
From the Terminator to Tigger the Tiger, inundated with a brash of unwanted groping allegations, law enforcement officials are scrambling to find out what to do and why. Judge Judy and Judge Joe Brown debate the issue.

Judge Judy: "Groping is defined as unwanted physical contact that is always perpetrated by a man onto a woman. That means ANY and ALL contact, period! Does Mr. Brown understand what 'period' means?...Perfect!"

Judge Joe Brown: "That all depends by what you mean by 'unwanted'. I've seen alot of women in my time who want it when it's hot, down and bothered, and regret it during the coolin' off period afterwords..."

Judge Judy: "You're stupid!"

Judge Joe Brown: "If a man is gropin' it's cuz a woman is hopin', shakin' her tail feather an' what not, and it don't matter here nor there, cuz the love game has been goin' on since the dawn of time, and that's why there's 6 billion people on the planet earth, and if a women is shakin' then a man gets to bakin'!"

Judge Judy: "Waaahhh!...Burt!!"

Judge Joe Brown: "I'm from the old school, you better act how the old school acts!"

Judge Judy: "I'm here because I'm smart, not because I'm young and gorgeous...although I am!"

Judge Joe Brown: "Who gives a damn!"

Judge Judy: "That's going to be the most expensive curse word you ever said!"

"Case dismissed!"
Judge Joe Brown: "You start trying to get cute up in here and we'll get ugly up in here!"

Judge Judy: "Sir, don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining! Two people can't talk at the same time. When my mouth is moving, it means that you need to be quiet!"

Judge Joe Brown: "I go on and on about manhood, but you're the sorriest case of womanhood I've ever seen in my 30 'ought years on the bench!"

Judge Judy: "BALONEY SIR!"

Judge Joe Brown: "OH, THE HELL WITH YOU! CASE DISMISSED!!"


Pick the gavels off the courtroom floor and tune in next time for another inconclusive battle of the TV judges! Only on Smooth Operator!


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