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Rural Town Replaces Mailboxes With Pinjatas
by Mark on 11/23/2004 (0)

Surprise inside!
CHESTERLAND, OH - Faced with a police evidence garage filled with crushed and battered rural mailboxes, Chesterland mayor Basil Worthington takes novel approach

Worthington quietly stepped down row after row of shattered rural mailboxes, stopping to pause at a familiar one, as an Army General does when somberly inspecting his fallen troops

"I-I remember this one growing up. It's Mrs. Hoegler's. She was a bee keeper...that's why it's shaped like a bee hive and painted yellow. That's Ed Bear's famous Fokker Triplane mailbox...just a pile of struts and canvas now. I realize that these are just teenagers playing 'mailbox baseball', but I don't think they understand the toll they take in hurt feelings on folks out here. It's hard...very, very hard..."

Worthington outlined a new town ordinance calling for all mailboxes to be shaped like Mexican Pinjatas, reasoning that if you can't win, you might as well give them what they want.

"The hell with it. They want something to take a swing at, might as well let them have some fun. We should have the old boxes replaced by January."

When asked the obvious, if the new boxes would be filled with candy, Worthington smiled ever so imperceptibly

"They might be...but then again, they might be filled with something else!"ispl

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