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Famed Archaeololgist: Ancient Egyptians Had Really Nice Asses
by Mark on 2/3/2005 (0)

She should have won a Grammy, buried in her Jammies!
CAIRO - Keen Egyptologist Zahi Hawass lauds ancient lines

Sputtering madly, Hawass ran his hand over an Alabaster statue of Isis like a French masseuse over the wife of an American tourist

"Y-You see! Look at the beauty! The fine silky lines. The notion that Egyptian artists were blind to form and soft lines is absurd and untrue! Many, many ancient Egyptian sculptures celebrate the human form...the female in particular...with stunningly lifelike form and nuance."

Hawass moved dangerously close to the sculpture, in a purely academic way, of course

"Look at the full hips and firm stomach, the petite, finely defined breasts, and the full, beckoning lips. One could almost kiss them, and expect them to kiss back! I believe this lays to rest any notion that realism in sculpture did not arise until the European Renaissance. The proof is before your very eyes!"

"Yes! I excavated this wonderful sculpture with my own hand!!"
Hawass hopes to someday dedicate a special exhibit to Egyptian nudes, and freely admits the idea came to him on "one of the many extended digs away from my wife."ig


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