Jackass High School Kid Brickheadedly Screws Up Shop Project
by Mark on 6/14/2005 (2)
 | "Da-da-da DA -daaahh!" Brrrrrrr!!" | | CLEVELAND, OH - High school industrial arts 101 student Russell Heinz adjusted his safety goggles and flicked a razor shard of aluminum from his forehead with a quick agitated bat and a wipe.
"I-I-m almost there!"
Heinz exhorted breathlessly
"Three days ago this was a 2 inch square piece of aluminum block, and I've only got another millimeter to go! Yeah!!"
Lurking nearby, Heinz's shop teacher, Bill Mahusky, chortled heartily and cracked a wry grin
"Boy, that Heinz boy is an idiot. He was supposed to turn that block into a trowel handle 1 inch in diameter and put a diamond knurl on it. Look at it...it's about the size of a toothpick now. Jackass can't seem to stop once he gets going...kinda like when my 7 year old kid eats cotton candy at the 4th of July home days until he hurls. Boy whatta dumbass!"
Surrounded by a heaping pile of aluminum shavings, Heinz cranked the Bridgeport lathe handle one last clockwise turn, a sudden ca-runch! Ping! and the aluminum was gone. A sudden look of surprise transformed his expression from one of grit determination to abject, unadulterated idiocy.
"U-Uh...Mr Mahusky...can I have another block of aluminum? I did it again...M-Mr. Mahusky?"
Mahusky already had another in hand, tossing it to Heinz with a fatherly tsk-tsk
"Boy, that kid worries me. I'm not sure what'll happen when we start welding next quarter, but one things for sure, I'm having Mrs. Siedel's speech 101 class next door moved into the junior high building across the parking lot first!"
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