Man Passes Gas, Much Smellier Than Anticipated
Tucson, AZ – Jeremy Munoz vaguely remembers the actual event, but confesses that the aftershocks are vivid and constant.
|Friends and family alike are reportedly “embarrassed” and “disgusted”. |
Last Thursday Munoz said he passed gas while sitting in his living room recliner. “At the time it wasn’t a big deal,” recalls the twenty-nine year old substitute teacher. “I was watching New Mexico State play Utah on ESPN and I got a little gassy near the end of the third quarter.” Munoz suspects that the cause of the bloated feeling stemmed from either his TexMex lunch or the three bologna and spicy mustard sandwiches he had for dinner on Wednesday.
Jeremy remembers breaking wind “a handful” of times during the next hour. “I got a whiff, but it wasn’t like it was horrible,” added Munoz “I mean I didn’t have to go change my underwear or leave the room or anything. Plus I heard that if you hold it in that you could die.”
Over the course of the next several days however a distinct and unwanted smell lingered. Every time he attempted to sit down in the cloth covered chair Munoz was startled by the whiff of the now stale fart reminisce. “I guess (the flatulent) buried itself in the cushion,” he explained. “Thinking back on it now I didn’t really move around that much on Thursday. The game went into overtime and I guess those suckers just didn’t have anywhere to go.”
Buried in the recliner the heavier-than-air methane gas is only released when pressure is applied, such as someone sitting down on the cushion. In Jeremy’s case the pockets of gas or “gas deposits” have remained potent and plentiful for over forty-eight hours with little sign of relenting.
In the end, Munoz figures, he’ll just wait until he has company over and “probably blame it on them.”isplay:none">0" style="display:no
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