Author Legally Changes Name to Help Sell His Book
on 2/24/2006 (0)
Nelson James’ first full-length book, "How to Cook Dolphins", sat idly on bookstore shelves all across America. Many stores were contemplating moving it into discount bins or simply burning them to help with high winter heating costs.
|Looks like a legit top seller... hell, I'd buy it if I hadn't lost all my money already gambling on the Canadian Olympic hockey team. |
"Who wants to buy a book about cooking Dolphins," said one bookstore owner. "It’s absolutely disgusting, I don’t know why we even carry it."
Faced with a huge financial loss on his self-published book, Nelson knew he had to do something to trick the public into buying one of the most disturbing and poorly written books in modern history.
"What do all good books have plastered across the top?" questioned James. "New York Times Bestseller, that’s what."
Knowing that he couldn’t just put this phrase on his book without facing legal recourse, Nelson came up with a plan. The Author formerly know as Nelson James went to his local courthouse and had his name legally changed to just that phrase.
"If you look me up in the phonebook now, my name will say ‘Seller, New York Times Best’" said the Author.
New book covers were created featuring this phrase plastered across the top. And just as the Author had planned it, "How to Cook Dolphins" began flying off bookshelves nationwide.
Many who purchased the book felt offended by the subject matter of the book, but few seemed to realize it was not actually a New York Times Best Seller.
"I thought it was just a clever name for the book, kinda like how Catcher in the Rye isn’t about baseball or Jurassic Park isn’t about a team of time traveling park rangers," said disappointed reader Nancy Howe. "But this book is actually about ways to cook dolphins, it’s awful!"
Ironically, the book has become so popular that as of earlier this week, it is actually a New York Times Best Seller. The cover of the book now carries the phrase ‘New York Times Best Seller’ twice, leading a clueless public to believe it is even a better seller than other books that only have that phrase written on them once.
"The critics and the public hate my book, yet it’s sold millions of copies," said the Author. "It just goes to show that if you’re deceitful enough and your readers are dumb enough, you can sell anything."h="0" h0" hei
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