American Idol Hopeful Taylor Hicks Accused Of Dancing Just Like A Honky
by Mark on 3/8/2006 (40)
 | You can dance if you want to... | | (AP) Herky, jerky, Ray Charlesesque American Idol hopeful Taylor Hicks was recently accused of dancing "just like a honky" according to the National Peanut Gallery late Tuesday. NPG reporter Arkisha Watts elaborates:
"Ha!...Taylor dances just like a honky! All herky jerky like he got a potato chip up his butt! White guys can't dance, so give it up Hicks!"
Indeed, people with rythym nationwide have grinned and guffawed at Hicks comic attempts at rock and rythym, a puzzling mix of Ray Charles, Elvis and Stevie Wonder, minus the wonder, at least the Stevie kind. In spite of a warm, genteel Southern persona, potent retro-soul lyrics and a compelling magnetic smile, Hicks spasmodic jukes and jerks fail to fall were he intends them to, that is, in a believable melding of body, motion and soul.
"Trouble is, he white!" Lambasted Detroit resident Leona Shabazz. "Everyone knows white guys can't dance. If you can't cook, stay out the kitchen, that's what we say!"
Hicks continues to charm American viewers and voters, however, in his surprise longevity on the hit TV talent turner series, but Am Idol Randy Jackson keenly cautioned "Dog, you the bomb! And when I say bomb, I mean Buddy Holly thick frame lenses, Bing Crosby Pat Boone cracker-ass Richie Valence La Bomba bomb! Yeahh!""0" styl
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