Crappy Tasting Toothpaste Must Be Good Because It's German
on 9/10/2006 (0)
GERMANTOWN, PA - Germantown resident Jimmy "Skeeter" Phillips came to the conciliatory conclusion that the crappy lard tasting toothpaste he bought for 6 bucks a tube "must be good because it's German".
|Einen Blah! |
"The first time I tried this lousy stuff, it struck me immediately as reminiscent of lard, plastic pop bottle and plaster of Paris with a smidgen of mint thrown in for good measure, I suppose. I was about to toss it, when I noticed it was distributed by a dental lab in Stuttgart, Germany, and my perception changed instantly. Those Krauts are genius chemists and engineers, right? The way I see it, it must taste crappy for a good reason, like there's super fluoride protection, or whitening and cleaning ability in it, right? This must be cutting edge, German engineered super-toothpaste, the way I see it!"
Unknown to Phillips, the rank, past expiration date toothpaste was actually purchased in bulk by the German firm in question from a tiny lab in Malaysia, originally advertised as "Super Happy Joy palm-kernel oil enriched, lemon-grass fluoride ultra-teeth whitener" and cleverly repackaged for individual resale on the unsuspecting U.S. consumer marketone
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